85/2023

ANONYMOUS BIOGRAPHY

Throughout his life,
His privileged existence,
With the wife-beater father,
The subservient sister,
The slightly soft brother,
The invisible mother,
He has been in denial,
Has always seen himself
As a cut above,
As better than the rest,
As a gentleman cavalier
With a healthy dose of
Cynicism,
Humour,
And, above all else,
Power,
Power to make money,
Power to subjugate,
Power to lie,
To do what he wants
Without consequence.
No more.

R 26/03/2023 20:30

Strange how some words just come to you. And how appropriate they can be.

30 more pages of edits done. The clocks going forward meant much too late a night and much too late an awaking. And doing nothing eats time, but feels good.

Finished Rickman’s diaries, finally. Sad, in essence. And it felt a touch intrusive to be reading them. The bottom line, the universal truth, is that we are all this complex, just not as visble to the rest of the world. And wealth, honestly (in Rickman’s case) or dishonestly gained, doesn’t ever buy happiness, just convenience.

Reading the appendices to Remarque – the backlash didn’t take long to come after publication; interesting, actually, how much the falsities of the backlash (calling facts lies and lies facts) resemble what the right-wingers around the world are doing right now. The world is again in a dangerous place – perhaps it never left it. Straight line from WWI to tyranny east and west.

So much remains to be done. And constantly that feeling of time becoming ever more finite and compressed and rare.

A long long walk in wind and rain, and then self-drying internal heat and sunshine, to chase away yesterday’s black dogs.